Just Jump

What is your deepest fear? I’m not talking about spiders or needles or the dark. I’m not even talking about the government. The fears I’m talking about are the fears we have deep inside of us. The ones that we may even sacrifice our individuality or life experiences for. For me it’s rejection.

For most of my life I have avoided social situations. I love connecting with people and being invited to things, but I’m also terrified I will say or do the wrong thing. Time and time again I sacrifice connection and friendship for the comfort of knowing no one has rejected me. I am safe in my little bubble, sad and a little lonely, but safe.

Fear is nothing new. We’ve all been there once or 90 billion times. It can keep us from progressing, from trying new things. Fear is brainless. It works on our deepest insecurities and turns our dreams into tragic realities before they even get the chance to come true. When we believe the voice of fear, we might act rude or distant. We are less authentic. We don’t take risks. We stay the same.

Becoming aware of my fear was the first step in breaking its control. One day I just decided I was going to be me. I started making choices because I wanted to. I stopped worrying about how I would be received and focused on being open.

Once I started calling the shots, fear had to take a backseat. It’s here, but it doesn’t get to control my decisions anymore. Instead of holding me back, it shows me the things which will bring me the most growth. If I’m not feeling uncomfortable every now and again, I’m not pushing myself hard enough.

Sometimes stepping into fear brings failure. I mess up or look bad. I feel awkward and uncomfortable. Sometimes after doing something that scares me, I walk into my room and just scream into my pillow and roll back in forth in my bed talking to myself, asking why in the heck I did it.

Those are the parts of facing fear we don’t really talk about, but man do we feel it. They can feel like little black holes of eternity sometimes. But then we move past it, and ultimately grow because of whatever we learned.

Sacrificing your individuality doesn’t help anyone in the long run. It may help them to stay safely in their comfort zone, and they may like that. It doesn’t require people to think too hard and it allows them to continue mindlessly, never waking up.

Facing your fears liberates yourself, and those around you. My advice will always be to do it. Go for the job that scares you or travel to that cool place you saw on Insta. Take that yoga class. Get stranded at the airport and be forced to hitchhike to the grocery store. Fall on your butt 50 times during yoga and laugh uncontrollably while the girl next to you kills every. single. pose. Whatever it is for you just do it.

Do everything that seems impossible, and do one thing every day that makes you feel like you aren’t safe. I triple dog dare you to try it for a week and let me know what happens.

*Spoiler Alert*
Magic is what happens.

Love you all SO MUCH!

-K

 

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