Recovering Perfectionist

Hello beautiful, inspiring friends! I would like to start out by saying THANK YOU. I have the most incredible community that surrounds me and I am so grateful for the beautiful messages sent, love given and friendships formed this year. Starting a blog was kind of scary and I’m continuously grateful for the love and support I’m shown on here. You guys are the best & I’m so glad I get to share little pieces of my heart with you.

I’ll let you in on a little secret. Although, if you’ve talked to me for longer than 35 seconds before, then it’s probably not a secret. But here it is- I am a perfectionist. I like things to be immaculate. It’s not enough for them to look good, I need them to truly deeply be good on every level.

My perfectionism has given me a bit of an all or nothing mentality. This can be amazing when things go well- many of my successes are big and flawless. The shadow side to this quality comes when things don’t work out. When things get messy I often find myself giving up on things because they don’t fit into my “perfect” story I have crafted.

While I was reflecting on my year last week, I decided to listen to “His Grace is Sufficient” a talk given by Brad Wilcox. In it he asks, “When learning the piano, are the only options performing at Carnegie hall or quitting?… There should never be just two options”. I realized that by stopping when things didn’t look exactly as I had envisioned, I wasn’t allowing myself the chance at great success. In the moments that I was primed to grow the most, I slipped into the shadows.

In 2018 it’s my goal to lean into the moments where things are messy and imperfect. I am going to trust that God has a plan for my life. He knows what I need to learn and all my deepest hopes and desires. I am grateful for that, as well as the belief I have of a loving savior who atoned for me.

I am going to be better at receiving and utilizing his grace throughout the entire process of change. There is so much power there. I am grateful, oh so grateful I have been saved by grace. I am grateful for a Savior who lived such an open, beautiful and humble life. It is my deepest hope that this year, I will allow myself to stay open. I hope I will remain teachable, and that I will allow grace to change me.

With these reflections, I challenge you to go after the things that scare you. Set big goals, and then chase them. When you mess up and completely fail at your goal, don’t throw it away. Find a way to make tiny steps, never stop trying to improve. Allow Christ’s grace to carry you when things start getting tough and always remember that you’re worth it. This is going to be an incredible year, I can already feel it.

Thank you so much for your love. You guys are THE BEST ❤


One thought on “Recovering Perfectionist

  1. Kiki your comments are so inspiring. I love how you express your self. I must confess though that you did not get your perfectionist trait from me. I’m more from the “close enough is good enough” school. I need a New Years resolution to try and do things better. Maybe we will meet somewhere in the middle, that seems like a good place to be.

    Love you, Grandpa Mike

    Dear Kirsten,
    I am also a perfectionist! So I sympathize with you. I am almost 70 years old and now look back on my life. I have learned that it is very hard to be a perfectionist in this telestial world!!!!!!!!!! For now, in this life, I have learned to look past flaws in things and in people. That makes it much easier to live here. Someday I hope to be in a place where I fit in better, but for now I am trying to be patient. Perhaps you can learn this lesson sooner than I did. I certainly hope so.

    Grandma Jane


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